anzila: (F-you I have a dino)
Chapter 1: Auto Mire

‘Life is unfair,’ probably the single most imparted lesson in human history after ‘don’t touch that,’ and ‘your face will stick that way.’ It’s meant to explain to a five year old a mystery that has stumped theologians and philosophers for generations; the problem of why bad things happen to good people. Alternatively I suppose it could also be a way to shut kids up when they started trying to use logic to their advantage, not that I really have what one would call extensive experience with children. My dubious parenting skills aside, though, the message itself is a pretty accurate one. Life, in my experience, isn’t fair. It doesn’t care about good or evil, right or wrong, justice or corruption; in the end we’re all just playthings in its sick twisted game.

Chapters 1-5, Spoilers through White Knight for TDF, probably a few for Twilight book 1 )
anzila: (Default)
TITLE: Empty Glass
AUTHOR: [ profile] anzila
FANDOM(S): Cowboy Bebop, The Dresden Files
CHARACTER(S): Faye Valentine, Harry Dresden
RECIPIENT: [ profile] tigerzahn
RATING: PG-13 for some strong language and mild suggestive content
WARNINGS: A very angry Faye with a gun.
SPOILERS?: Some very major spoilers for Cowboy Bebop. No spoilers for the Dresden Files
PREVIEW/SUMMARY: For Faye Valentine, her latest bounty was supposed to be a nice simple lining of her pockets. The only problem was, this particular bounty has turned being frustrating into a fine art.

What happens when unstoppable misfortune meets immovable bad luck? )
anzila: (Beware the birds)



title or description
anzila: (Default)

Please feel free to spread this around.
anzila: (F-you I have a dino)
Title: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Sparklepire Chapter 4
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Gen, Dresden Files/Twilight crossover
SPOILERS: Story takes place following The Dresden Files: Proven Guilty and the second Twilight book.
Summary: Harry and Thomas take a little road trip.
Author's note: Chapter 5 should be following sometime tonight
Prancing Death and Sparkling Carnage )

[Chapter 1, Chapter 2,
Chapter 3
anzila: (Default)
You know, if nothing else I think the fact that I had fun giving a History Power Point lecture, and the students had fun listening to me give it, tells me I'm in the right profession.
anzila: (Love mai pokemans)
I'll post something of substance once my brain starts working (This is my Friday, and my weekend is one day long)

But for now, current Pokemon team!

Right now my team consists of a plant serpent wearing some fancy goggles, a electric zebra with a spiked hard hat, a prehistoric bird raptor with a bag of shiny sand, a giant desert crocodile with wearing a magic bell on her collar, a ill tempered piranha with a strange evolutionary lump, and a sentient candle that feeds off souls and carries around a magic claw.
anzila: (fistbump)
Congrats GG on reading Level 24! Please distribute your skill points wisely.
anzila: (Love mai pokemans)
Oh yeah, guess who just beat Red in Soul Silver with a team of level 65 Pokemon on his first try? That's right, this guy.

Cut for recap of the Pokemon Battle of the Century )

So yeah, needless to say my team is taking a well deserved rest now. They really pulled through there.
anzila: (Nastu-Tea)
They're seriously making a sequel to Kampfer? I'm not sure my brain is ready for that much concentrated hilarious horribleness.
anzila: (Loki-Smirk)
The last character you defeated in a video game is here to help you in the zombie apocalypse, and they have your favorite pokemon with them! Oh, and you can use the object to your left to help you.

So there I was, back to back with the Magic Mirror from Snow White, standing atop a overturned car as a massive hoard of zombies formed a circle around us, their rotted jaws distended as they snapped at air fouled by their rank breath. I could feel Charmander's claws dig slightly into my shoulder as the little guy repositioned himself, eager to unleash the fire burning in his belly and indulge his battle instincts with the flesh of scorched corpses.

Gripping the hilt of my ninja-to, I yanked the blade free of its sheath as my eyes drank in the staggering odds against us, and feeling my heart racing in my chest as cold sweat poured down my back, I let my mouth form a small smirk.

"Mirror Mirror on the wall. Whose the most asskicking one of all?"

"Many asses you have yet to kick, and yet when it comes to the most, your skills are most sick."
anzila: (fistbump)
Time: January 29th of the year Two Thousand and Eleven

Location: The frozen north of Planet Earth's Western Continent, as reckoned by most of the inhabitants of said continent.

Status: Dire

Today is day 9 of my 12 day work week. I find myself with low provisions, no medicine, and desperate few hours of sleep. I can feel the madness setting in on me. Yesterday I found myself commiserating with the spirit of a Children's Trading Card. Today I attempted to walk the Dinosaur in front of the Science Museum, and when confronted by the police began to berate them for not doing more to stop the senseless transformation of innocent programs into Nulls by careless Users. Even now my mind wanders to thoughts of Zombie Survival plans.

Should future generations find this account of my trials, do not remember me as a tyrant, but as one who dared to dream of a world where weekends were still held sacrosanct.

I must go now, for the Raja spirit who likes to help me play card games has returned and I must banish him once more. Also, I should look like I am working.

A. Zila
anzila: (Mod Bunker)
Some days, it's good to be the Mod
anzila: (*Headdesk*)
I swear, cover letters have to be the most contradictory impossible to write pieces of BS I've ever encountered, and I went to a Liberal Arts college.
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